In early May, I received a sweet card from Kayla Oliver. She quoted James Bryant Smith, and wrote that she hoped this would be like “balm for my soul,” as it has been for her:
“I am one in whom Christ delights and dwells.
I live in the strong and unshakable Kingdom of God.
The Kingdom is not in trouble and neither am I.”
Little did Kayla know how much I needed to hear that, and how very fitting it was for me, given all that has been happening with my job due to the pandemic.
I have been working as a Diagnostic Medical Sonographer, or Ultrasound Technologist, for over forty years. I was fortunate in the mid 1970’s to bring the first US machine to Pierce County in Washington state. It was an exciting time, and I truly love what I get to do.
Since moving to Orlando in 1988, I have been offered many growth opportunities in the field of women and children’s applications for ultrasound. I have had plenty of ups and downs in my career, but never have I experienced anything like this pandemic.
We began to prepare once we saw what was occurring in New York, since we do provide direct patient care. Near the end of March, I was directly exposed to an employee who was hospitalized that same week for COVID-19. This was stunning, and brought home the reality that the coronavirus was here, too. Thankfully, I have been blessed with no symptoms to date.
As the public was told to isolate, both our inpatient and outpatient volumes dropped dramatically. Then, in mid-April, the leadership at the hospital gave us 2 days to redeploy 20% of our staff; which meant 20% of all of Radiology, and this included the Support Staff.
Somewhere in the midst of this, I noticed a pattern in my prayer life. I had been praying earnestly for my team, for our health, and that there would be no exposure and plenty of PPE. But all at once I realized that I was exclusively praying these prayers in the mornings before work, and in the evenings at the close of the day. I never took the time to pray during or throughout the day, which was startling to me. How could I forget to remember God in the middle of all this? I shared this with my community group (for which I am so very grateful we have continued to meet, now twice per week via Zoom). I felt their prayers strengthen me, even as my manager and other imaging supervisors sought to determine who would be redeployed. We could not, and still cannot, assure anyone that their jobs are going to still be here when this is all over.
Our Central Florida region hit its peak in COVID cases 3-4 weeks ago. In the last two weeks, our patient volumes have increased and we have been able to bring some team members back; however, the administration has been very clear that this is temporary. None of us know if the virus will resurge, and if it does, this would make redeployment necessary once again. In the hospital we are not only aware of COVID lurking, but the insecurity of the times for the entire medical environment. What is it ultimately going to look like?
As I reach out to those of my team members on redeployment, I pray that I can offer them something encouraging. I want to give them hope, while still being honest that we really don’t know what things will look like. I pray that they will trust me, and know that I am hopeful to bring them back. I have had so many sleepless nights, and visions of their hurt and disappointed faces. I have no control. Which of course, none of us do.
Recently I, along with other employees over 62 years of age and in ‘good standing’ were offered an early retirement. I was in turmoil, and I thought this offer was going to be a directive. I worked on my budget all night long, I hardly slept but tried to pray. The next the morning, I was unexpectedly reminded of the truth: that no matter what comes, I will be alright. God will provide. It was only after this realization that I heard the early retirement was being offered as an option. I was so relieved, and I felt again, like ‘ye of little faith.’ He doesn’t leave us, though we so easily wander and worry ourselves away.
All of my frailties have been emphasized in my own mind these past months. Yet all the while, our shared study of the Psalms and such wonderful encouragement and love from my community group has trully sustained and comforted me. I am so grateful for our loving God.
My go-to verse for years has always been John 14:18, which I find to be so incredibly relevant for all of us during this time: “I will not leave you comfortless; I will come to you…”, a reminder that we are to call upon Him when we are fearful, for He is and always will be our hope…
Olga was born in Bergen, Norway. In the 1950's, her parents immigrated to Tacoma, Washington, in order to be near her father's brother. She had a very Norwegian, old-fashioned upbringing. She and her sister were sent to Sunday School with the neighbors, since her parents, and particularly her mother, were not church-goers (though her dad would go with me if she asked him). The most profound change in her life came upon moving to Florida, evidenced not only by the fact that now she sees sunshine almost every day, but also because it is here that she found her faith, through a wonderful coworker and friend at ORMC. She had no idea of the relationship that the Lord wants with us, and so she often says that her life was literally saved once she moved to Orlando.
Our own stories are powerful, and even more so once shared. As Fred Rogers put it, "never underestimate the impact that your mere existence can have on another human being."
Here with Voices, you'll have the chance to read stories from various members of our church family, each chronicling what it feels and looks like now that so many things have changed. If you’d like to comment or learn more about this series, you can reach out to us at hello@lakebaldwinchurch.com.